....Or so I thought.
So, we short sold that house and moved on out. We made it to Pike Creek; a city long lusted
after by my hubster and me. Ever since
we signed our oldest lil dude up for The Little Gym out this way years ago, we
mutually decided that this area is nice during our drives to his weekly classes. The condensed version of how we really ended
up here is we a) were underwater big time in our mortgage on the small ranch in
Newark we owned and wanted OUT b) have a kid beginning Kindergarten this Fall
and desperately wanted him out of our old crappy school district and into one
of our state’s top ranking elementary schools and c) the area’s got a good rep.
After narrowing down the long and arduous process of
figuring out where the heck we were going to move our lil family to, we opted
for condo renting. We’d tossed around
the idea of renting a house, but I’m just not keen on the idea of maintaining
someone else’s home for them. The
thought of paying for all utilities, garbage removal, heating, cooling lawn
maintenance and everything in between on a home we wouldn’t own didn’t seem
such a great idea to me. It meant to me
that we’d still have all of the bills and stresses we’d already had, only on
another owner’s house. It also meant
less money allocated to paying down our non secure debts and paying into our
savings. Not too appealing….
John and I agreed to give this new city and new school a go,
and “slum it” for a little bit. (My
husband’s term, although I’d hardly say we’re doing that and am well aware that
there’s plenty of folks out there living in “slummy” conditions, so I’m not
trying to offend anyone here…) Simply
put, we’re forgoing all of the bills a single family house brings with it,
keeping our paid off vehicles, and scaling back on our spending. We’re in a lovely condo- about the size of
our previous home. It actually feels
more spacious to me given the high vaulted ceilings and the layout. With a
cheap monthly rent and tons of inclusive utilities and ammenities. And, I’m surprised to find that I’m really,
really liking it here! John… eh. Not as much.
And oddly enough, for all of the reasons that I DO like it.
I am NOT a yard person.
Sure I like being outdoors. I
love bike riding, pools, running around with the kids and our pooch. All that stuff is fun. But I hardly ever did those things in my own
yard. I was always packing them up into
the truck and heading for play dates and parks and indoor game places. Furthermore, the time and energy John spent
on that damn lawn could have been better spent with me and our kids.
We see him little enough with the work hours he’s gone
for. It used to bug the bejesus out of
me when he’d be gone all day at the office, only to come home and tell me he’d
eat the dinner I’d made for him later because he’s “got to get out there and
start on the grass before it gets too late”.
“WTH, doode? Like, I haven’t had
adult conversation or interaction all day long.
Been waitin’ on your behind to get home for hours, chit-chat with me,
help me with these crazy little people, and I even cooked you this dead animal
dish *(Reminder, Vegetarian here!), and off you go to spend our precious time
together working on the yaaard?....” Nope.
I was not shaping out to be the happy camper I thought I’d be when I first
laid eye on that spacious, green back yard.
And. It. Took. Hours.
Sometimes, even long after I’d bathed the boys and had them in bed, good
ole Lawn Boy would enter the house hot, sweaty and stinky from the dark
outside……… only to tell me he’d have to FINISH UP TOMORROW! “Uhh,
‘scuse me?!” ….. Pfft. Moral of story: Lawns are overrated! Lest I mention the ants, the bees, the toys
that the kids left out all over the lawn I’d have to continuously walk around
to pick up, the dog poo NOT picked up, the huge scary trees that swayed so much
in the storms we’d be frightened of them crashing down on the roof and which
left gigantic branches all over the yard to be gathered and piled in the corner
for burning. I’d been over this lawn
care business for a long time.
Not to mention the nosey neighbors, and the crazy ones who’d
always ask to borrow things. The trash
men leaving our garbage can in the middle of the damn driveway causing me to
cruise across the lawn sometimes to get into the drive. The flower beds that never took off, and the
vegetable gardens that rodents and bugs got to.
Pulling weeds and spraying killer on the side walk in front of the
house, and shoveling the snow from our driveway and sidewalk as well as our
elderly neighbors. None of that was too
enjoyable for me; have to admit.
Forward to not having to deal with any of that. Can you envision my smiling face? Ahh. Maintenance
guys take care of it all- and our surrounding shrubbery here is far more
pleasing to the eye than anything we’d ever mustered up. When something’s broke- they fix it. “They” meaning the people we hire, like the
plumber who came out this morning to replace a cracked pipe in the hall
bathroom sink, and our landlord foots the bill.
Did I mention our landlord is completely awesome? Yep, she is.
A single lady who purchased this place about four years ago, got
transferred by her employer half way across the country, and is renting just
because she doesn’t want to take the financial loss with selling in this
market. To be more clear: A landlord who
is NOT AROUND. Who is busy with her own
life, happening miles away from us. And
who enjoys communicating minimally, preferably via email, and who allows us to
take care of whatever we need to and send the bill her way. I’m hesitant to even put this out there into
the Universe, less I jinx it, but I do believe we’ve hit the jackpot here! She even asked US to choose the paint colors
for EACH room before moving in, and hired painters to make it happen for
us. I sure as heck can’t complain………..
And it sure as heck doesn’t feel like “slumming it”.
So, the problem? None here. Other than maybe I
fear I’m enjoying this too much. I know that John wants to have a home and a
yard and projects to work on together.
He envisions purchasing a home in the near future, and gutting it. He wants trampolines, and pools, and
grass. I thought I’d wanted that
too. I even thought just before moving
here that maybe, just maybe I’d made a grave mistake. That we may be miserable here, and that this
lifestyle change would be a rough adjustment.
How crazy was it for me to realize that I like smaller spaces. Less cleaning, less clutter, less
responsibility. The “American Dream” was
drilled into our heads since birth- home ownership and all that comes with it:
bar-b-q’s, big family dinners, swing sets.
Only I had the humongous kitchen, and huge hard, and the monthly mortgage
to prove home ownership and didn’t really enjoy any of it. It’s just not who I am, who we are.
We’re less “sit around the grill and fire pit” kind of folks, and more
“sit inside the air conditioned living room playing games with your alcoholic
beverage” kind of peeps. Or better, “Always
on the go” folks. I’d rather spend my
afternoon running around town than knee deep in dirt working on a flower
bed. I’d rather have one small hall to
cross come laundry time, than lugging baskets across an entire house or up and
down stairs. I’d prefer to swiffer for
five minutes, versus the half hour plus it used to take me. I’m beginning to think that the dream of a
big beautiful home to own is….. for the
birds!
The kids are happy.
The dog’s adjusted. (And, by the
way, totally loves the hell out of the awesome new dog park right down the
road!) And things are good right
now. (There was a crazy downstairs
neighbor issue for the first month and a half, but even that worked out. The nutty biatch up and moved away!)
So, for now… My
mentality is, if it ain’t broke- don’t fix it.
I’m content to sit tight right where I’m at and focus on the many other issues of vast importance that fill my plate these days. (Like both boys beginning school next week, for instance.)
Sometimes things aren’t what they seem. Who knew this would be an ongoing learning
opportunity? So many lessons,
really. All of the time I spent worrying
about our impending move here- a waste.
Sure makes this mantra prove pretty darn true, huh?
And some times, what you think
you want isn’t what you really
want. Sometimes it’s good to let go of
old ideas, ones that maybe weren’t even your own to begin with, and open up
your mind to something different and new.
I’ve learned that what I saw on Oprah one day when she visited Denmark
and reported that the people there are overall generally happier and more
content than their global counterparts, because they follow this motto “Less
space, less things, more living” is actually true. (Well, that and the Danes in general take
life slower, have more assistance from their government, and focus more on the
family and environment- leaving work earlier than we do to be together, and
biking everywhere for instance.) For me, I can see clearly now that the “American mentalities” that had been
fed to me from every angle don’t even truly jive with what makes me happy. Not at this moment in time, anyway. No new car payment, high mortgage bill, or
fancy anything has ever brought me the peace of mind I’ve found here in this
lil condo with my dwindling debt and extra family time.
For the birds^
So, for now at least, Condo livin’ is gooood. And it’s so surprising to me, still, that I
would even say that. What a pleasant
surprise! A welcome lesson in life this
time that didn’t include some kind of painful endurance, struggle, or fight to
figure out. A lesson this lil condo
tucked away in the hills and trees of Northern Delaware has taught me. We never do know what unexpected pleasantries
and lessons life has to offer us.
And! Not
all lessons have to be hard learned- and that’s another lesson unto itself
right there!
Images found @:
myfreewallpapers.net
martindaveyillustration.co.uk
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